Am i dating an insecure man
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My last dating situation was probably one of the worst. In the past I have dealt with a cheating ex who tried to justify his doggish behavior. He was intelligent, ambitious, and had a promising career that paid him extremely well.
He had great conversation, opened doors, was considerate, and liked to talk about feelings. Probably because his feelings were accusations targeted towards me.
8 Signs He's Emotionally Insecure (Don't Even Bother To Date Him)
After this, our relationship went downhill. If I talked about guy coworkers in an innocent manner, he questioned my relationship with them. Insecure men come in all disguises, but most share the common traits of appearing sensitive and caring.
To most women a caring man who listens is a hot commodity; but it quickly changes when his insecure traits take over the relationship. These include a need for constant reassurance and approval, distrustful, smothering behavior basically he wants to be with you all day, everyday. In addition, most insecure men are jealous or possessive. Chris possessed all of these traits. I totally agree with you that this guy who tells me that he wanna see me cry is insecure man.
I was really confused that he has feelings for me and that was why he always insists on me On the other hand he is so rude to me That day I suggested something and he said stay quiet in front of everyone and I was embarrassed and told him don't ever talk to me like that and now he is the one who is mad at me!!! What is the deal with this behavior?
He always projects his mistakes on me and be mad at me without any reasonable excuse Anonymous Mar 25, It's disrespectful to keep someone waiting like that, your time is valuable too. And when a man starts to signal that you're not a priority to him - you are not required to tolerate poor treatment like that, nor should you tolerate that. You did nothing wrong here. He was rude, he was ignorant, he was disrespectful, he did not make you or his plans with you a priority and as a result of HIS actions, you had to cancel.
There's nothing to misunderstand about that, it is what it is - and it's HIS fault, not yours. If he treats you like this and then when he calls you "jump" - he will interpret that as you being desperate for male attention and willing to jump at the opportunity for it, even when the man has treated you poorly and taken you for granted. He already knows he owes you an explanation. You don't have to tell him that. And if he's a decent person, he'll offer one without you asking.
How YOU love yourself and how you handle yourself - your own actions - are what signal to others that you're a "prize. On the flip side of that, if you respect yourself don't tolerate poor treatment, do not have sex on the first date, do not get drunk or drink too much, etc. How you value and treat yourself - signals to others how THEY should value and treat you: And if he walks away from you - LET HIM - because that's a big red flag that all he wanted to do was use you for sex, and he had absolutely no intention of considering a relationship in the first place.
HIS actions are also speaking loud and clear - are you listening to what they're telling you? This is a big red flag dear "he told me "but you had sex with someone who is not your boyfriend before Honestly dear, I believe this guy's out to use you for sex because his actions are falling in line with that. Don't let yourself be used here dear. If he's going to be ignorant about it and walk away because you won't permit him to use you for sex - then LET him, because he's not a good guy if that's the case. Gentlemen do not do this to women. He is who he is and unless HE wants to change, nothing you do or say will force him to do that.
He may or may not be compelled to change by you leaving, however, if he's this deeply insecure, chances are it'd take a lot more than that. Meaning, HE would really have to want to change and not because of things going on externally, but because he really, truly wants to change - internally. Don't take him on as a "project" dear. Many women do that and think that over time, they can have a positive effect on the man and his behavior and that in time things will change. And while that's a nice dream, it's not reality. Because again, the reality is that we cannot control others, we can only control our reaction to them.
Additionally, we cannot help those that do not want the help, or that don't think they need it. Anonymous Mar 27, He always projects his mistakes on me and be mad at me without any reasonable excuse.
Dating An Insecure Man: Why It Just Won’t Work
They lash out at others, they exhibit odd behavior, they overcompensate, they attempt to control others - it's just what they do. Which is why I strongly advise AGAINST dating deeply insecure men because staying with one can actually be incredibly damaging and leave you deeply scarred yourself. Mirror, do you agree with me???? I concluded that this guy is a manipulative player who is not serious enough to sit and speak about his feelings directly I concluded that this guy's actions and talk are part of playing the game on me with bad intentions because if there was any good intentions he would be at least honest and stop playing these games So what I did is that I ended everything with him Do you agree that I did the right thing??
I am in my thirties and you know women are desperate in this age, I want to marry and have children before it's too late that is why I always question myself if I lost this guy I need your opinion and thoughts if you read my comment Love or hate??? I wanna see you cry 2. I like seeing you mad 3. I feel so happy when you are upset 4.
I wanna lock you in a cage 5. He makes me mad and then he acts mad at me 9. He laughs when I am hurt and "say do you expect me to comfort you" and then laugh at me I help him but when I need his help he says he is busy or ignores me. I just read all of the discussions here now! And I am in the moment of venting, angry and hurt at the very moment Why are women get all these from men? I wonder but not surrender who has create all of us to began with?
The human natures, nature of human. I am hurting badly I don't hate men, and I think some women have the same behaviors that made all men hate uswomen in general, as we hate some of the men's nature. So to whom we shall blame? I am so frustrating with the issues I have read in this discussion. MOA, is there any good solution on people getting hurt from a relationship?
8. He needs constant validation
How am I going to make a final peace with myself? One of my girlfriend recently said to me that she cuts off sexual activity from all men since she is very much a sexual person in nature. I don't get it? I knew even the monks and nuns have the desire of sex! We are human, human has seven desires as nature, how can we repress the sexual desire like that?
That's not natural and human. If there is only the Platonic love or called spiritual love ONLY, that's insatiable in human nature, who can take on that for our short life span? I need to understand this better from MOA, would you share your minds with us? I'm not taking him on as a "project", Mirror. Not too long ago, when I let him back in after cutting him off, he did seem to understand that he needed to be a better man. And for some time, it did seem that that's exactly what he was trying to do. I saw glimmers of change. Perhaps he's expecting me to revert to my old self, act insecure and needy, and chase.
I'm not doing that, of course, it's exhausting - to the point where I might even be ready to call it quits. I'm not thinking straight so I shall take no action now.
5 Ways To Find Happiness With A Guy Who’s Insecure
Riding the elevator earlier, my watch read "" I think I know what you will say about that. Mirror, I just saw the numbers "" again. A few days ago, it was "", "" and "". What's your take on this? This is an area I'm not familiar with. PO, "Do you agree that I did the right thing? If you sensed him being evasive and vague and non-committal - then chances are there's a reason for that.
He's either playing a game, he's insecure or he's emotionally unavailable, non of which make for a great relationship. Anonymous Mar 29, 5: He's an abuser who clearly suffers from low self-esteem which creates control issues within him. You need to remove yourself from this situation dear.